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4 C’s – Guide to your mental wealth

Chaos

Like everyone else in the UK (and most of the rest of the world) my life was turned upside down a few weeks ago.  We were being advised to work from home if we could and keep away from people as much as possible.  What we now know to be social distancing. The phone calls were coming in cancelling or postponing work, and some of my clients weren’t sure whether to meet me face to face or on the phone.  My landlord was emailing suggesting a rent holiday and yet for some it just seemed like business as usual. I remember trying to do my weekly shop only to find empty shelves – what was going on? Then we were officially told we had to lockdown and so I prepared to pack up my office and bring what I needed home. There was a feeling of fear and anxiety everywhere. This felt chaotic to me, and I don’t even have to deal with the experience of home-schooling children!

I started to identify the following:

  • I realised that my very natural flight or fight instincts were kicking in to survive.
  • My life as I knew it was under threat as was everyone else’s (which resulted in people panic buying).
  • I started to recognise I was being pushed out of my comfort zone with no control.
  • Routines as I knew them were having to change drastically and rapidly.
  • A lot of my self-talk started with ‘What If’ which was fuel for patterns of negative thinking.

Something had to change….

Control

At this point I noticed a lot of the decisions impacting on my business were out of my control and felt nervous about this and the impact it would have. I didn’t like seeing the selfish behaviour of people with their panic buying, I didn’t like the fact I was losing business, and I was glued to the news channel and yet did not like what I was hearing. There seemed to be chaos all around and so much was out of my control, and as human beings we do like to be in control. But I felt very alone in this – although I wasn’t. So I started to think about what was within my gift to manage and control and let that become my focus. I was surprised to find there was quite a lot:

  • Managing my state of mind and being positive – this led to making simple and positive changes.
  • Limiting how much media I exposed myself to – once a day.
  • Keeping in touch with friends and family.
  • Thinking about how I could run my business, just in a different way, or who I could help.
  • I started to think about the things I enjoy but never have time for like exercise, home cooking and catching up on some reading.

The minute I chose to take control of what I could manage I started to feel more positive and confident once again. When you are in control you can cope, you have more clarity and can, therefore, make some sound decisions. I started to feel that I could look at this situation as an opportunity in so many different ways.

Now I could make the right choices…

Choice

Once you acknowledge what you are in control of, you can then make some choices about what to do in this situation. I started to speak to other people and we were all agreeing on one thing. This is the time to support people and clients with my expertise, not sell services. Businesses are not buying as they are facing cash flow difficulties. So I started to think about what decisions I could make where I could make an impact and difference, particularly as I was faced with blank pages in the diary.

  • I chose to donate one day a week to coaching NHS staff – to show my appreciation.
  • I am offering some very loyal clients some complimentary wellbeing sessions, as I care about the impact this situation is having on people.
  • I have chosen to accept I need to learn how to use Zoom to have a better experience when communicating with people. In less than a week, I am using this daily.
  • To stay connected with people, I have chosen to talk more on the phone and email less – just to see how people are doing and show I care.
  • I am also preparing a plan for what my business will look like after lockdown.
  • I have a set of new goals for the foreseeable future.

 

Now I felt so much more in control. I have a feel for what I want to achieve, and I am speaking to both familiar contacts, loyal clients, as well as some people I haven’t worked with before. The benefits to me getting to this stage have most certainly boosted my wellbeing, my mental state is more positive and I am making the right decisions at the right time and pace.

 

So what does that result in…?

 

Calm (& caring)

So once I acknowledged the chaos, and accepted what I could control, I was clear in my mind about what to do next. I had more clarity about the decisions I made about how best to use this time for however long I have it.

  • Acknowledge there is no point fighting a global and national crisis.
  • Accept what is within your gift to control.
  • Make an effort to make positive changes.
  • Take time in reaching the right decisions for you – some new goals.
  • Decide to give something back and show I care.
  • Take action, what steps are you going to take day by day to get closer to those goals.

And the benefits to doing any of this:-

  • I am in control of my situation now and I feel content.
  • I am happy to see engagements filling up in my diary.
  • Learning and growing in the knowledge of video conferencing technology.
  • Feel positive about attending a 2-day training course virtually.
  • Feeling an enormous sense of gratitude and appreciation.
  • Some excitement is building as I plan for the future.

When you are feeling at this stage and perhaps get a telephone call giving you bad news, you might find yourself back at Chaos. Recognising and acknowledge how you are feeling and start to ask yourself, what is it you can control about that situation.

It is quite possible once the lockdown is over, and we start to return to our offices, and commence life again as we did before, we might find ourselves going through this process all over again.

I would love to hear about your emotional and mental journey through this difficult time. Drop me an email at helen@horizonscoaching.co.uk

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MAD (Making A Difference) about Mental Health at work

This session is targeted at Senior Leaders, Managers & Team Supervisors, in fact anyone with responsibility for staff.    Through this session we explore why mental health is important, and gain awareness of the impact on an individual suffering with mental health issues.  Managers will feel more confident about how to start a conversation and what they can say, how to say it and what NOT to say. 

Press Pause, Live Well.

Recognise what causes us to feel stressed and learn more about the signs and symptoms to understand the impact on our health.   Gain self-help tips to manage stress in order to achieve a greater balance in life.  Develop an awareness of Havening Techniques® to relax and build longer lasting resilience.

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07730 920010
helen@horizonscoaching.co.uk
How to achieve a calmer life & cope with challenges.

Explore what hinders us from feeling calm and why, and gain an insight into the 4 C’s of mental wealth, Chaos, Control, Choice & Calm.   Gain a true understanding of the benefits of remaining calm.  Learn self-help techniques and top tips to achieve a sense of calm in your life and address challenges in a positive manner.

Positively Manage Worr-ease

Did you know 97% of what we worry about never even happens?  Consider the negative affects fear and worry have on us emotionally and mentally, as well as identify types of worry.   Learn new strategies to manage our worrying thoughts in an empowering way, along with controlling some of our self-talk to enable us to feel positive.

Sleep Well, Feel Great.

On average we spend 33 years in bed – but how much of that is good quality sleep?  The benefits of sleeping well ensure greater concentration and focus, high energy levels and improved health.  Gain an understanding of the science of sleep, what cause disruption to our sleep pattern and gain strategies to promote a better quality sleep.   Finish off with a short guided mindfulness session.

Spring Clean Your Thinking

Explore how our negative thinking impacts on us in this fun session.  Discover ways of demolishing and re-setting some of our old thinking patterns which may no longer serve us any purpose.  Achieve more confidence and empowerment by making some simple changes to our thought process

Manage Your Emotions

Based on The Sedona Method, learn a unique way for making positive changes and gain an insight to the simple process of releasing underlying emotions that hold you back.  Become a master of your mind and emotions, then develop the art of the “release technique” or letting go.  Simple, fast & effective in order to achieve calmness. 

Less Stress, More Success

Do you find there are not enough hours in the day, frustrated that we never get to the bottom of our ‘To Do’ list?  With 80% of employees feeling stressed at work, explore and recognise the causes of stress.  Gain take-away tools to improve your time management skills, plan your day with ease and learn how and when to say No!

Dreams do come True

Ever wondered why 92% of people do not achieve their goals?  Join the 8% that are achievers by exploring, in this fun session, how goals can be achieved through combining various Neuro Linguistic Programming techniques in goal setting accompanied with visualisation and the creation of a Vision Board.  All of which will get you what you want in life.

The Impact of Words – Mind Your Language!

Our language holds massive power to manifest change. Words can either be empowering and encouraging or destructive and damaging.  Gain a deeper understanding of just how powerful our “language” is and the impact of the words we use with our self-talk and when speaking to others.   With an understanding of the latest neuroscience delegates will learn techniques that will help them get the best out of themselves as well as build engaging and positive relationships with others.

The Power of Visualisation

Visualisation – seeing the goal as already complete in your mind’s eye – is a core technique used by the world’s most successful people. Visualisation is effective because it harnesses the power of our subconscious mind, activating the creative powers of the subconscious mind, motivating it to work harder at creating solutions. You’ll also notice new levels of motivation and find yourself doing things that normally you would avoid, but that will take you closer to success.

I’m Possible verses Impossible

Beliefs are nothing more than a thought – often holding us back.  This belief change session provides 6 simple steps to greater self- fulfilment and success.  Our beliefs can either destroy or enrich our life.  Unhelpful beliefs hinder our ability to achieve our desires and goals.  These simple steps help you tap into your resourcefulness, to shine and flourish in life.

Digital Detox

Are we losing our ability to know who we are and what’s important to us?  Understand the addictive affects over exposure to the digital world has on our health, and explore techniques to make better choices in managing information overload.  Make smart choices that enable us to take control of our lives in a healthier way.

Pause & Relax

Say thank you to your staff and give them an hour to experience and learn anti-stress & relaxation techniques.  Understand the importance of taking time out for ourselves, still the mind, relax the body and learn how this can be achieved through breathe work, visualisation, Havening Techniques® and guided mindfulness.  All of which can be self-applied after the session and have great health benefits.

Mindfulness – a mental spa break

Experience a half hour guided mindfulness session to still the traffic in our minds.  This ancient practise is known to improve sleep, relieve stress and regulate our emotions.   It also increases mental clarity, improves concentration and boosts our working memory.  Along with smoothing gentle music this session creates and promotes a sense of wellbeing.

Powerful Thinking Everyday

Gain an awareness of our most powerful tool in the world – our brain.  Learn the difference between the conscious and the subconscious mind, how to unlock the brain’s hidden power and how use this to our advantage.   Not only will this assist in encouraging more positive thinking, you will can more focus and reduce stress.

07730 920010

helen@horizonscoaching.co.uk

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